Friday, October 7, 2011

Lonely Girl

Have you ever had one of those times where your listening to some music and a song comes on that seems to fit your mood absolutely perfect? Cause it just happened to me.

The song is called Lonely Girl by the fierce lady P!nk. I'm not going to debate whether you think the song or artist is good or not, so kindly keep your thoughts to yourself.

I know it seems adolescent and immature to say that "This song totally fits my life" but as music is an expression of feelings it stands to reason that someone somewhere is going to capture what you might be feeling and express it in such a way that others can maybe know a little bit.

If you read this blog in any capacity you know I've had a pretty rough year, from diagnosis where I almost died to last month, which was particularly hellish and I've had to re-evaluate a lot of what I thought my life was very recently.I try not to let it bother me, I try to keep a positive attitude and think that these things are temporary, but sometimes life has a way of trying to overwhelm you.

Overall the entire song speaks to me, but these lines in particular "I'm lookin' for a way to become The person that I dreamt of when I was sixteen Oh, nothin' is ever enough Ooh, baby, it ain't enough for what it may seem"actually caused me to stop what I was doing.

Right now it seems like no matter what I do, in any area of my life, is enough. For every step forward I try to make, I seem to make two steps back. In my life and treatments. Yet I am still going to keep pushing forward, if one way doesn't work I am going to try something else. My dreams may have to be tweaked or put on hold, but I am going to keep striving for them.

If any of you that read this blog feel the same, know that you are not alone and that we must keep fighting!


  1. I totally get what you're saying about music. Sometimes it helps to express the feelings that we can't even find words for.

    I'm so sorry that you got WG at such a young age. It was devastating to me and I was in my 40's! I continue to learn to deal with it, even after 8 years!

    You can live a full and happy life ... you're just taking a slightly different path than you thought you would. OK ... a TOTALLY different path ... but that doesn't mean that it's a bad one.

    I have a lot to be grateful for that I wouldn't have if I hadn't gotten WG. One thing is the amazing people that I've met that have helped to encourage me and support me and the other thing is the intense appreciation that I now have for every day of life.

    Take a deep breath and always try to have fun on your journey, no matter what path it takes you down! :)

  2. Thanks Sue :)
    I am coming to realize that there are a lot of things to be thankful for. Some days I just have a harder time seeing it than others. I was actually thinking about doing my blog posts this month based on things I am thankful for.